The Problem of Self-Knowledge
Success has many components, such as setting goals, establishing routines, and keeping records. Practicing these helps us to achieve what we’re aiming for.
Yet winning depends on more than actions. There are psychological factors at work throughout the whole process. Intelligence, interests, courage, and skills play roles in our success endeavors. And underlying these is a basic principle: self-knowledge.
It’s been expressed many ways over the years.
“Know yourself.” - Socrates
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the results of a hundred battles.” - Sun Tzu
“A man’s got to know his limitations.” - Clint Eastwood as the movie character Harry Callahan
“To grow yourself, you have to know yourself.” - John Maxwell
I’m all in favor of the idea of self-knowledge, but I find it quite difficult to realize! Books, tests, and experiences have their place, but I feel that in spite of my efforts, my depths remain unexplored. As hard as I try, knowing myself seems beyond reach.
The psalmist David deals with this topic in Psalm 139, but he has a different take on it. Instead of looking within himself, he recognizes that God is the One who knows him.
This is how David begins the psalm:
You have searched me, LORD, and You know me. 2You know when I sit and when I rise; You perceive my thoughts from afar. 3You discern my going out and my lying down; You are familiar with all my ways. 4Before a word is on my tongue You, LORD, know it completely. 5You hem me in behind and before, and You lay Your hand upon me. 6Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. - Psalm 139:1-6
And this is how he ends it:
“Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” - Psalm 139:23-24
David isn’t introspective; he lets God do the investigating. The Lord knows his heart and mind. God understands the substance and course of David’s life.
If we are to learn about ourselves, we must ask God for insight. He knows everything about us; nothing surprises Him and nothing gets past Him.
The Lord’s knowledge of David, and of us, is total and complete. But the process of us becoming cognizant of His findings takes time. The verses quoted above reflect this reality. In the former passage, the psalmist reminds God that He has searched his heart. That’s a past tense. But in the latter verses, David asks God to search him. Why, if God’s already done it?
The problem isn’t with God’s knowledge; the issue is our ability to receive it. We’re not as prepared for divine wisdom as we might think!
David suspects this about himself, which is why he prays for the Lord to show him the obstacles in his life–”anxious thoughts” and “any offensive way.” For us to learn about ourselves, these impediments have to go.
The Hebrew Bible uses only one word, sar`apim, for “anxious thoughts.” It’s rare in the Old Testament, showing up only twice. (The other instance is Psalm 94:19 which says, “When anxiety was great within me, Your consolation brought me joy.”)
These two verses tell us that in response to our anxieties, God gives us revelation and consolation. He comforts us, but He also shows us what’s wrong inside. This gives us an opportunity to trust Him to solve the problem and help us mature as disciples of Jesus. Anxiety doesn’t have to destroy us; through the grace of God, we can overcome it.
The other issue David mentions is “any offensive way,” which is three words in English but only two in Hebrew: derek and `oseb. The former means “way, road, distance, journey, manner,” while the latter means “pain, sorrow, idol.” It, too, is an uncommon term, occurring only four times in the Old Testament. Here are the other verses:
“Jabez was more honorable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, ‘I gave birth to him in pain.’” - 1 Chronicles 4:9
“On the day the LORD gives you relief from your suffering and turmoil and from the harsh labor forced on you” - Isaiah 14:3
“Therefore I told you these things long ago; before they happened I announced them to you so that you could not say, ‘My images brought them about; my wooden image and metal god ordained them.’” - Isaiah 48:5
Pain, suffering, and images–that’s some negative stuff! No wonder David’s concerned; so is God! The Lord doesn’t want the hearts of His people to be damaged. Life in a fallen world already has enough trouble; we don’t need to carry more inside of us!
How does the Lord answer David’s prayer? The vocabulary of the Greek Old Testament gives us a hint. The Greek version of this psalm uses the word anomia for “offensive.” Its literal meaning is “lawlessness.” Now both the Hebrew and Greek words for “law (torah in Hebrew and nomos in Greek) have more than a strict legal meaning. The words refer to authoritative instructions and guidelines for life. To be lawless, then, is to be untaught, undirected, out of sync with a healthy manner of life.
When we suffer these, we feel the pain of being disordered. Our relationships with God and others are impacted and we carry within our souls the discontent.
And we may not even know why!
It’s possible that the cause of our distress in life could be an unconscious hurt, grief, or object of worship. We feel the effects, but we don’t know the cause.
But God does!
David isn’t afraid to ask for His help. He believes the Lord can and will tend to him with loving discipline. God’s ministry isn’t maudlin; He brings genuine correction when needed.
So there’s hope for us! The Christ who calls us to Himself knows the condition of our hearts. He intends to free us from habits and thoughts that harm us. We may not be aware of what’s influencing us, but the Spirit is, and He’s going to use the Word to help us grow past these. As we follow Jesus, He will form us to be like Jesus.
And we’ll learn a few things about ourselves along the way!
(Bible verses are taken from the NIV.)
(Image is from https://cdn-icons-png.flaticon.com/512/7554/7554567.png)
